


Fifteen

by CoolDoggo



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Age Difference, Drabble, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, age related angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-14
Updated: 2017-11-14
Packaged: 2019-02-02 03:39:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12718890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoolDoggo/pseuds/CoolDoggo
Summary: Yuri confesses his love to Viktor. Viktor wishes he hadn't.





	Fifteen

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this fic on my tumblr as a response to the prompt "Things you said I wish you hadn't", but I liked it enough to post here. 
> 
> Also this fic heavily features an adult pining over a minor. If that's not your jam, smash that back button.

Yuri’s staring is making Viktor nervous. He’s looking at him as if he wants to say something, and Viktor feels like prey under his gaze. 

Finally, he says it.

“I love you,” he blurts out, determined expression unwavering.

Viktor swears he hears him wrong. “Excuse me?” 

“Don’t make me repeat myself, you asshole,” Yuri growls, “I said I love you.” His voice quiets, and he suddenly looks nervous, soft. “I have for a long time. Go out with me.” A question disguised as a demand.

The words weigh heavy on Viktor’s mind, and suddenly, two years worth of repressed affections toward Yuri come bubbling over. 

Yuri was 13 when Viktor met him, a 13 year old with tenacious spirit and a lust for competition and victory. He saw the relentless look in his eyes, hungry for gold, hungry for fame. Immediately, Viktor knew he was special. 

But he was 25, and 25 year olds don’t fall in love with 13 year olds, especially not at first sight. He chalks it up to loneliness and desperation, and fills the void with one night stands for the next several weeks to kill the feeling. 

The feeling doesn’t go away, but Viktor buries it deep inside, where he doesn’t have to look at it, doesn’t have to deal with it. 

Yuri’s 15 now, and now they’re rink mates, have been for a year. He’s grown into something beautiful in Viktor’s eyes, and like a fine wine, will only better with age. But he’s 27, and 27 year olds don’t love 15 year olds, and they certainly don’t date them either. 

Viktor’s tongue feels swollen in his mouth, like he can’t speak. He feels like a deer in headlights, caught unaware and staring helplessly into his death. 

“You don’t know what love is,” Viktor says. “You’re 15, don’t say things you don’t mean. You probably don’t even know what you want.” 

It’s bullshit and Viktor knows it. Yuri might not know what love is, but he knows what he wants, he always has. Hell, does he himself even know what love is? Whatever love is, it’s not pining over someone half your age.

Yuri bristles under Viktor’s words. “Fuck you,” he spits out, venom dripping, “You don’t know what you want either. I see the way you look at me, I know you see the way I look at you. Don’t undermine me like that, Viktor.” 

Viktor wants to grab him and kiss him, wants to shout  _yes I see the way you look at me. I love the way you look at me. I love you too. I want to make you mine_  but he can’t, he shouldn’t. The number 15 is an angry scarlet letter weighing heavy on his moral compass. 

So instead he says. “You’re too young. Do you have any idea how old I am?”

Without missing a beat, Yuri says, “Then wait for me. Wait until I’m old enough.”

Viktor doesn’t want to wait. He wants him now. He’s not a saint, he can’t wait. It’s now or never, especially now that the dam has broken.

“Yuri. I can’t. I have to go.”  _I’m sorry_

The way Yuri’s face scrunches up contorts Viktor’s heart into something painful. He has to go, he can’t stay here lest he cave and do or say something he regrets. He turns around, and he leaves. Yuri’s saying something, probably telling him the conversation isn’t over, but Viktor chooses to block him out. He can’t deal with this.

On the way home, he stops at the liquor store to buy vodka to drown his feelings. He has practice tomorrow, but fuck it, he’s Viktor Fucking Nikiforov and he can show up hungover to the rink if he wants to. 

_Yuri, I love you too, but I wish you hadn’t said anything._

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi to me on tumblr. Yuriyuu.tumblr.com


End file.
